On Monday night my friend, Ruth, and I went to the Yeovil SANDS service of remembrance as part of national SANDS week. SANDS is the national charity that carries out amazing work supporting families who have experienced the loss of a baby through still birth or neonatal death.

The service was immensely moving and sad all the same time. Knowing that there are other people walking in your shoes somehow helps you feel a little better, whilst at the same time devastates you because you know their pain. We had time for reflect and Ruth and I lit a candle for Tilly and I wrote her a message.

For me, someone who displays self control and an ability to ‘keep my emotions in check’, occasions like this are an opportunity to let myself be sad, cry a little and reflect. I am person who, in a way, needs permission to cry and I think. with loosing Tilly, it is a little bit about being scared of loosing control. Maybe if I start, I may never stop.