Blogs, Vlogs, Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. The world of social media, gives a platform for important issues but I wonder whether it takes away a sense of true personal communication?
Occasionally I still have moments where I feel paralysed by a deep sense of sadness and grief, but I don’t write a cryptic Facebook status. I don’t feel it is the write platform for it, not for me. This blog is sometimes a way of me channelling my grief, of sharing thoughts on loosing a baby and hopefully for helping others through confusing and dark times too. Maybe others consider this an inappropriate platform to discuss grief, sadness or the death of a baby. The cryptic Facebook status seems like a cry for help, and this makes me wonder: Have we lost the art of communication? Are we no longer able to talk to our friends? I feel a bit hurt if a close friend feels that they need to share sad, painful news via a Facebook status, do people not feel that they are able to talk to their friends anymore? And then there’s the ‘life is shit’ status…what does that mean? And does it mean something if I don’t respond?
At the opposite end of the spectrum is the ‘my life is so amazing’ status. Creating a sense that we should all live up to an amazing (if unrealistic) ideal. Again, as a friend sometimes it’s lovely to hear good news via a more personal route…the ancient art of talking or even a text message. We are all guilty of this sometimes I’m sure…
And maybe that’s why it’s so hard to talk. Because we think that everyone else is having an amazing time and we feel feel inadequate if we’re not, or because everyone is having a shit time and we don’t think we should bother them. Who knows, but maybe we should talk more? A little bit of personal attention, making your friends feel like friends…not someone among 450 other people you met once or twice.
This week is Baby Loss Awareness week and I wonder how many people feel that they can’t talk to people because it isn’t what we do anymore? I know I’m not the greatest at opening up but maybe that’s because I can’t wade through the social media mine field and work out who would like to listen and who would like to just read my status?
So, if I don’t respond to your cryptic Facebook status it’s not because I don’t care, it’s because, if you really wanted me to know, you would tell me. One of my longest and closest friends once said to me “if you wouldn’t shout it in the play gound, don’t put it on Facebook” so maybe that’s something to consider and maybe we can start talking to each other a little bit more instead. Don’t judge a person by their Facebook Status or their Instagram and this week, if you know someone has lost a baby, ask them how they are.
Let’s talk more.